I got a troll for my birthday

Yeah, I got some nice DVDs and other stuff from real people. But the Cheddarsphere has given me a troll. His name? gbfan001. Let me tell you how it started:

Once upon a time, I wrote a post for this blog. (You can read it here, but not right now, because this is important.) I submitted it to be a part of last week's Carnival of the Badger, which was hosted at Badger Blog Alliance. gbfan001 occasionally posts at BBA, in addition to his own blog (I won't make you read it). At any rate, I complained in that post I wrote about something gbfan001 had said on BBA--that favoring student privacy over military recruiters in MPS high schools was, and I quote, "unpatriotic." I sad something about how those criticizing MPS's discussion of limiting recruiters were part of the "bad half of the Cheddarsphere."

gbfan001's reply at BBA consisted entirely of

Thanks Folkbum, Now I know I was right LOL
I actually followed a Carnival of the Badger, Volume III link to his blog and was honored to be even mentioned in his post lol. Had a little fun with my reply.

How do they know we are the "bad" side of the Chedderosphere? ;P

Had that been all, I wouldn't have been bothered. But gbfan001 came here to cause trouble. He took particular exception to my statement that "My students by and large are not stupid: They tell me (without my saying a word) that they hate Bush and his war in Iraq." I now reproduce, in its entirety, the comments to the recruitment post:

Him: Im sure that you dont say a word about Iraq to your students lol I am honored you included me with Owen as a bad part of the wis blog scene(insert dr evil laugh here) I will be honest knowing that people like you are teachers is a major reason I have chose to homeschool my children. But thats ok the kids you teach can work for my sons(once again insert dr evil laugh here)

Regards,
GBfan

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Me: Yeah, I'm not even going to dignify that.

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Him: Gee no sense of humor in any of you lefties Must be a total bummer going through life always pissed off

Well You have a great Holiday Weekend Mr Grumpy Gus :)

Regards,
GBfan

So, let me get this straight: Someone comes to my blog, impugns my professionalism, my integrity, and my ability to teach, and I should laugh it off because of an "lol"? It gets worse, and I mean worse than just gbfan001 polluting comments to my other posts. You may have noticed that above there was a link to gbfan001's "reply." This is not because I want you to read it, but just so you know that I'm not making it up when I quote from it. He criticizes me for much more than the statement I cited above--about how my students are not interested in fighting in Iraq. He actually quotes my entire paragraph (in italics, his response follows):

My students by and large are not stupid: They tell me (without my saying a word) that they hate Bush and his war in Iraq. They know that Republicans haven't done much for African Americans in general and urban African Americans in particular. A handful of seniors every year choose the military, but the vast majority--I'd say upwards of 98%--decide for themselves that fighting Bush's war is not the future for them.

Oh where to start first does he really think we will believe he hasn't been filling their heads with chants of "No Blood for Oil" and "Bush is the real Terrorist" Please! Come on my 3 year old would see through that one.

Then this line "They know that Republicans haven't done much for African Americans in General and Urban African Americans in particular" Good Rock this man is a teacher? Hmmmm were to begin were to begin? Oh I remember it was 18 southern Republicans who filibustered the Civil Rights Act of 1964, Wait it was Richard Russell Democrat Georgia who lead that effort oops my mistake. I'm pretty sure Vice President Gores daddy also voted against that measure. I seem to remember a President named Lincoln ran as a Republican he did something for African Americans cant see to recall what that was at the moment. Lets keep going this is kind of fun. All former Wizards in the KKK who are Senators please stand up. Damn another Democrat you can sit down Grand wizard Byrd I mean Senator Byrd. But what do I know I mean all the love the democrats have shown the African American community has done so much to help.

Wait poverty in the inner city is worse after the Trillions spent on the "Great Society" The structure of the black family has been destroyed by the "love and caring of the left" The Teachers and their Union are working desperately to destroy educational choice in Milwaukee while achieving a less than 40% graduation rate. Who is fighting for inner city children who live in Milwaukee in reality its the EVIL White Republicans who live in areas like Waukesha,Peshtigo and Wausau.

But its not the M/L/P's fault their efforts to "improve" the lives of African Americans failed they had good intentions. Teachers like Folkbum can go on enabling failure and blaming it on us Evil republican boogie men. Hell the left has only had what 35 years to fix the problem when they were in charge and they made a Hash of it.

As gbfan001 might say, were to begin? We can talk about how the modern GOP has turned the party of Lincoln into the party of Dobson. Does gbfan001 even know about the Southern Strategy? Did he notice that Ken Mehlman came right here to Milwaukee to apologize for the way the GOP has used, abused, and refused African Americans for several generations now? I don't know.

Again, if that had been it--a misguided and semi-literate rant about politics and race--I would have left it alone. But gbfan001 made it personal; he continues to attack both my professionalism and my committment to teaching the children of Milwaukee. His post, believe it or not, is titled, "This is why I homeschool." The "M/L/Ps" like me (I'm guessing moonbat/ liberal/ peacenik, though I'm not entirely familiar with conservative shorthand) with all of our "chants" are the ones ruining Milwaukee's children and their bright future as targets for IEDs. gbfan001 doesn't know me. He doesn't even read my blog very well if he thinks I teach my students "chants." Not even I have ever chanted "no blood for oil"--and I've been places where I could have (and I'm not talking about my classroom). Maybe it's standard operating procedure for conservative bloggers to slip "four more years" or "Hillary is a bitch" into their work memos or powerpoint presentations or whatever it is that gbfan001 may do at his job. Maybe he teaches his home-schooled children how to hunt Democrats and abortion providers. But that's not the way we do things over here.

I have often called for detractors to come visit my school and classroom for a day to actually see what I do, so that they don't have to so obviously talk out of their hats. They never do. They sit there so smug and self-assured that SpongeJohn GardPants is personally saving the brown and black children of Milwaukee that they can go on with their libelous filth and, when called on it, laugh it off because we "moonbats" don't have a sense of humor. I told gbfan001 so, in his comments, told him that since he didn't know what I teach he should "kindly shut [his] piehole." Was that a poor choice of words? Perhaps, but his reply incensed me:

shut my pie hole now there is intelligent response [. . .].

Funny I don't remember being rude in my post smart even a little bit funny but never rude [. . .] As usual you on the left call name while never defending your position.

Well you have a good day with your Wunderkinds you know the ones who "Hate" their president.

Oh and since we are now pals, all that time you were working without a contract were you getting paid? Just a question

you may now resume name calling

Regards
GBfan

I hope that by now, with context behind you, you can see how this would infuriate me. In fact, I've sat on it for several days so that I won't say anything else I regret. But in this response you can also make out, I think, everything that is wrong with some on the conservative side. I won't say all or even many--gbfan001 likes to smear with an inaccurately wide brush, but I don't. I've had many good, reasonable, rational, and thoughtful conversations with people on the other side. I try to avoid this particular species, though, because there is no point arguing with them. You can tell, because to him, slandering my professionalism and lying about what I teach is "a little bit funny but never rude." To him, calling someone a "moonbat" (or "M/L/P") is not name-calling. To him, branding all "lefties"--everyone from Joe Lieberman to obscure nobodies like Ward Churchill--as "Bush haters" is perfectly normal. To him, misrepresenting history or ignoring the parts he doesn't want to see is par for the course. But my asking him to "kindly" stop talking about that which he does not know apparently crosses a line. Hypocrite. That's all there is to say.

So, gentle readers of your humble host's blog, do make gbfan001 welcome. He is our guest, even if he is a troll, and as such, deserves exactly as much respect as he shows in his comments. [UPDATE: That means bug him here, not at his own place, please.]