I'm neglecting you, gentle readers . . .
. . . so go feed the bat instead.
At the current rate of an average $62.57 contribution, it will take just shy of 80,000 individual contributions to reach the $5 million goal. Given that, as I write this, there have already been over 5000 donors, that means each of my faithful readers need contribute only about 25,000 times.
Oh, what do I think about Wes Clark, you may ask?
Meh. I'm unimpressed so far.
See me on Open Source Politics. My No Child Left Untested series starts sometime this week.
Sunday, September 21, 2003
Sunday, September 14, 2003
Miscellaneous = Mousse in a Cell
Just a few short bits today
So I'm writing for this Open Source Politics e-zine/ metablog/ project thing now, and one of our number has thoughtfully installed some stats tracking things. (I'm not illtechnorate, but some things are beyond me at 8 AM on a Sunday.) The shocking thing? Of the most-used phrases typed into search-engines that found our site, recalldoyle.com is the third most popular.
I used recalldoyle.com in this essay about Wisconsin politics, knowing that, after dust-up upon dust-up between Gov. Jim Doyle and the Republican state legislature, there would be a movement afoot to recall him, especially given what's going on in California and what happened last year in Milwaukee County. (The Milwaukee County recalls are discussed in that same essay if you don't know what I'm talking about.)
I guess the idea of recalldoyle.com is so popular, it's leading people to my essay decrying the idea more than just about anything else that's leading people to Open Source Politics at all. (And really, the top two search phrases are save overtime and save our overtime, which ought to count as one search; they take you to this great piece by C. Brian Lavigne.)
I'm playing tonight (Sunday) at the Coffee House at 7 PM in a benefit show for Rethinking Schools, a great progressive-minded education reform outfit. Doors open at 6:30; a free-will donation is requested at the door. I'm probably playing first, with another teacher playing after me.
If you're not in Milwaukee to see me tonight, be sure to check out "K Street," the new HBO series which is airing at 9:30 central, featuring James Carville and Paul Begala. Tonight's guest is Howard Dean, and they're airing the real-live debate prep they did for him before Tuesday night's Congressional Black Caucus debate. C & B claim to have given Dean several lines for the debate, though in promoting the show they didn't say which lines. But my money's on the Trent Lott/ Martin Luther King line. I like Dean, but I could tell when he siad it that he didn't write it.
Just a few short bits today
So I'm writing for this Open Source Politics e-zine/ metablog/ project thing now, and one of our number has thoughtfully installed some stats tracking things. (I'm not illtechnorate, but some things are beyond me at 8 AM on a Sunday.) The shocking thing? Of the most-used phrases typed into search-engines that found our site, recalldoyle.com is the third most popular.
I used recalldoyle.com in this essay about Wisconsin politics, knowing that, after dust-up upon dust-up between Gov. Jim Doyle and the Republican state legislature, there would be a movement afoot to recall him, especially given what's going on in California and what happened last year in Milwaukee County. (The Milwaukee County recalls are discussed in that same essay if you don't know what I'm talking about.)
I guess the idea of recalldoyle.com is so popular, it's leading people to my essay decrying the idea more than just about anything else that's leading people to Open Source Politics at all. (And really, the top two search phrases are save overtime and save our overtime, which ought to count as one search; they take you to this great piece by C. Brian Lavigne.)
I'm playing tonight (Sunday) at the Coffee House at 7 PM in a benefit show for Rethinking Schools, a great progressive-minded education reform outfit. Doors open at 6:30; a free-will donation is requested at the door. I'm probably playing first, with another teacher playing after me.
If you're not in Milwaukee to see me tonight, be sure to check out "K Street," the new HBO series which is airing at 9:30 central, featuring James Carville and Paul Begala. Tonight's guest is Howard Dean, and they're airing the real-live debate prep they did for him before Tuesday night's Congressional Black Caucus debate. C & B claim to have given Dean several lines for the debate, though in promoting the show they didn't say which lines. But my money's on the Trent Lott/ Martin Luther King line. I like Dean, but I could tell when he siad it that he didn't write it.
Thursday, September 11, 2003
Of Straw Men and Paper Moons
It's only a paper moon
Sailing over a cardboard sea . . .
The Bush administration, to me, has always seemed plasticky, fake. And I'm not just talking about the way Bush took office; the whole thing has an eerie staged look to it, from the press events to Bush's phony Texas-by-way-of-Maine-and-New Haven accent. I don't need to mention the USS Abraham Lincoln, do I?
The impression of Bush on the campaign trial in 2000 was just as carefully crafted--it was an act, in fact, designed to give the impression that he was folksy and frugal. The Washington Post wrote that "Bush made his maiden voyage to Iowa and New Hampshire with a single paid advance man leading the way. Gore's traveling entourage included about 32 advance staff, half a dozen White House aides, his pollster, speech coach and media adviser." (Of course, Somerby was all over that one: "But somehow, in two full days of reporting, the writers never provided the actual data: the Gore campaign had spent $8.1 million, compared to $7.2 million for Bush. Was it true, that Gore had 'spent far more?'" I do love Somerby!)
But since his ascendancy to the Oval Office, Bush has grown progressively more theatrical:
Lately I keep thinking of Wag the Dog, you know, and of course, I'm not the only one. The funny thing is that in many ways, the war is not the overproduced sideshow, but the presidency itself.
That's not to say there aren't distractions. And Saddam Hussein is this president's straw man.
Yes, it's only a canvas sky,
Hanging over a muslin tree . . .
Now, I thought I knew what a straw man was, and then I actually looked it up. (I also do love the Wikipedia!) Turns out the straw man was originally in rodeos, if you can believe that. A man-shaped thingie stuffed with straw was there in the ring, the hope was, to draw the bull's attention long enough to let thrown bull riders get to safety.
Well, my friends, George W. Bush is the thrown bull rider. We are the bull.
Before September 11, 2001, the most challenging thing that Bush had ever faced was the stem cell research decision. I still remember his squished-up-in-thought forehead, trying to show he was serious, as he spoke from the movie set that is his ranch in Crawford. It seemed like this presidency would just be a statistical bump, an aberration that, as slickly produced and vapid as any summer blockbuster, would be forgotten soon after it left the White House--er, theater (sometimes I get lost in my metaphors). In fact, apart for some abdication of responsibility in North Korea and a general air of idiocy, I had found very little overall in his administration to object to, until that Tuesday morning.
It was there and then that the United States woke up to two things: First, we were not unassailable. Second, this president was never really riding the bull. It's been well documented how Bush was off the bull as the attacks were happening that morning, and everyone agrees that Rudy Giuliani was the only one really acting presidential.
But worse than that, since the release of the results of the congressional investigation into the terrorist attacks, we know that the bull had tossed Bush's phony cowboy self long before: The administration ignored repeated warnings describing al Qaeda activity and warning of attacks using hijacked airplanes.
The administration wisely tried getting back on the bull. As soon as it became clear that bin Laden and his group were behind the attacks, they went into Afghanistan after them. Trouble is, Bush couldn't stay on the bull for very long--bin Laden disappeared and Afghanistan slowly sank back into the swamp.
Lucky for Bush, the Office of Special Plans (great parody here) was on top of it, digging out the old stand-by straw man, Saddam Hussein. From jump street--basically, the afternoon of September 11--plans were rolling to tie the new war on "terra" to Iraq, and the neo-conservatives could start playing out their imperialist American fantasy.
So when, right on schedule, Bush's poll numbers got too low and the public started to forget about Afghanistan, we started hearing--how did he put it?--"March to war, march to war, march to war" with Iraq, to distract us from the fact that Bush was off the bull again.
In fact, if Saddam Hussein had not already been there, they would have had to invent him. We may be on the verge of seeing it now; since Saddam himself is MIA and Iraq is quickly becoming the worst quagmire since Viet Nam, I imagine that somewhere in the bowels of some agency there's a cabal of neo-cons desperately stuffing straw into a turban.
It's a Barnum and Bailey world,
Just as phony as it can be . . .
So then came Bush's address to the nation last Sunday. It bore none of the high production values we have come to expect from this spectacle of an administration. The only thing shocking about it was the Really Big Number.
But it did hold some telling moments: Bush is asking for our patience. "This will take time and require sacrifice," he says. We can't give up now, he says, for "[t]errorists in Iraq have attacked representatives of the civilized world, and opposing them must be the cause of the civilized world." Basically, he wants us to keep the faith. He wants us to believe in him.
It reminds me of the stories about Donald Rumsfeld a few months back, and his forbidding criticism of the US occupation. One columnist opined, "Questioning the president only makes our enemies stronger. Or as Tinkerbell would say, 'Every time you say you don't believe in the president, a U.S. soldier dies.'"
How does that song end? Oh yeah:
But it wouldn't be make believe,
If you believed in me!
Ella could make it work. But from this administration, it just sounds kind of desperate, doesn't it?
It's only a paper moon
Sailing over a cardboard sea . . .
The Bush administration, to me, has always seemed plasticky, fake. And I'm not just talking about the way Bush took office; the whole thing has an eerie staged look to it, from the press events to Bush's phony Texas-by-way-of-Maine-and-New Haven accent. I don't need to mention the USS Abraham Lincoln, do I?
The impression of Bush on the campaign trial in 2000 was just as carefully crafted--it was an act, in fact, designed to give the impression that he was folksy and frugal. The Washington Post wrote that "Bush made his maiden voyage to Iowa and New Hampshire with a single paid advance man leading the way. Gore's traveling entourage included about 32 advance staff, half a dozen White House aides, his pollster, speech coach and media adviser." (Of course, Somerby was all over that one: "But somehow, in two full days of reporting, the writers never provided the actual data: the Gore campaign had spent $8.1 million, compared to $7.2 million for Bush. Was it true, that Gore had 'spent far more?'" I do love Somerby!)
But since his ascendancy to the Oval Office, Bush has grown progressively more theatrical:
[O]n the one year anniversary of September 11th President Bush gave a speech on Ellis Island and the White House had gone so far as to rent three sets of Musco Lights which they set down on a barge across New York harbor and tethered in the water around the base of Liberty Island and then sort of blasted them upward and lit up the Statue of Liberty in a huge, fabulous way so it could be seen on television. [. . .] There is a new guy who's head of the presidential advance team. Presidential advance is the group of people that sets up all the presidential events 2, 3, 4 or 5 days ahead of time. He was a producer for Fox News.It all stinks: "I want you to like me," he says. "I want you to think I'm a good, regular guy." But it's also very transparent. Remember the speech in Indiana when the Republican officials behind the president had to remove their ties to look more like "normal" people?
Lately I keep thinking of Wag the Dog, you know, and of course, I'm not the only one. The funny thing is that in many ways, the war is not the overproduced sideshow, but the presidency itself.
That's not to say there aren't distractions. And Saddam Hussein is this president's straw man.
Yes, it's only a canvas sky,
Hanging over a muslin tree . . .
Now, I thought I knew what a straw man was, and then I actually looked it up. (I also do love the Wikipedia!) Turns out the straw man was originally in rodeos, if you can believe that. A man-shaped thingie stuffed with straw was there in the ring, the hope was, to draw the bull's attention long enough to let thrown bull riders get to safety.
Well, my friends, George W. Bush is the thrown bull rider. We are the bull.
Before September 11, 2001, the most challenging thing that Bush had ever faced was the stem cell research decision. I still remember his squished-up-in-thought forehead, trying to show he was serious, as he spoke from the movie set that is his ranch in Crawford. It seemed like this presidency would just be a statistical bump, an aberration that, as slickly produced and vapid as any summer blockbuster, would be forgotten soon after it left the White House--er, theater (sometimes I get lost in my metaphors). In fact, apart for some abdication of responsibility in North Korea and a general air of idiocy, I had found very little overall in his administration to object to, until that Tuesday morning.
It was there and then that the United States woke up to two things: First, we were not unassailable. Second, this president was never really riding the bull. It's been well documented how Bush was off the bull as the attacks were happening that morning, and everyone agrees that Rudy Giuliani was the only one really acting presidential.
But worse than that, since the release of the results of the congressional investigation into the terrorist attacks, we know that the bull had tossed Bush's phony cowboy self long before: The administration ignored repeated warnings describing al Qaeda activity and warning of attacks using hijacked airplanes.
The administration wisely tried getting back on the bull. As soon as it became clear that bin Laden and his group were behind the attacks, they went into Afghanistan after them. Trouble is, Bush couldn't stay on the bull for very long--bin Laden disappeared and Afghanistan slowly sank back into the swamp.
Lucky for Bush, the Office of Special Plans (great parody here) was on top of it, digging out the old stand-by straw man, Saddam Hussein. From jump street--basically, the afternoon of September 11--plans were rolling to tie the new war on "terra" to Iraq, and the neo-conservatives could start playing out their imperialist American fantasy.
So when, right on schedule, Bush's poll numbers got too low and the public started to forget about Afghanistan, we started hearing--how did he put it?--"March to war, march to war, march to war" with Iraq, to distract us from the fact that Bush was off the bull again.
In fact, if Saddam Hussein had not already been there, they would have had to invent him. We may be on the verge of seeing it now; since Saddam himself is MIA and Iraq is quickly becoming the worst quagmire since Viet Nam, I imagine that somewhere in the bowels of some agency there's a cabal of neo-cons desperately stuffing straw into a turban.
It's a Barnum and Bailey world,
Just as phony as it can be . . .
So then came Bush's address to the nation last Sunday. It bore none of the high production values we have come to expect from this spectacle of an administration. The only thing shocking about it was the Really Big Number.
But it did hold some telling moments: Bush is asking for our patience. "This will take time and require sacrifice," he says. We can't give up now, he says, for "[t]errorists in Iraq have attacked representatives of the civilized world, and opposing them must be the cause of the civilized world." Basically, he wants us to keep the faith. He wants us to believe in him.
It reminds me of the stories about Donald Rumsfeld a few months back, and his forbidding criticism of the US occupation. One columnist opined, "Questioning the president only makes our enemies stronger. Or as Tinkerbell would say, 'Every time you say you don't believe in the president, a U.S. soldier dies.'"
How does that song end? Oh yeah:
But it wouldn't be make believe,
If you believed in me!
Ella could make it work. But from this administration, it just sounds kind of desperate, doesn't it?
Monday, September 08, 2003
Do you think he and Zappa are jamming yet?
The thing that burns me up most about it is that Warren Zevon will be best remembered for "Werewolves of London." Not an awful song, sure, but as far as legacies go, not the one I would have chosen. RIP, New Von Razer.
Sorry about the sporadicity of posting here lately; it's not (entirely) because I don't love you any more. I do have some good things posted (and more coming) up at Open Source Politics, and, of course, I've spent too much time lately belaboring the obvious over on the Daily Kos boards. Mostly, though, it's just that the opening to this school year has been the toughest in my career so far. The thing what pays the bills gets the most attention.
Somebody found me today by Googling anagram howard dean. Well, for the curious: Howard Dean = Head Onward.
Didn't even need Andy for that.
The thing that burns me up most about it is that Warren Zevon will be best remembered for "Werewolves of London." Not an awful song, sure, but as far as legacies go, not the one I would have chosen. RIP, New Von Razer.
Sorry about the sporadicity of posting here lately; it's not (entirely) because I don't love you any more. I do have some good things posted (and more coming) up at Open Source Politics, and, of course, I've spent too much time lately belaboring the obvious over on the Daily Kos boards. Mostly, though, it's just that the opening to this school year has been the toughest in my career so far. The thing what pays the bills gets the most attention.
Somebody found me today by Googling anagram howard dean. Well, for the curious: Howard Dean = Head Onward.
Didn't even need Andy for that.
Saturday, September 06, 2003
A Dependent Woke Her
or, Weekend Open Thread
Talk amongst yourselves. Suggested topic this week: Where were you on September 11, 2001?
And don't forget to check Open Source Politics all this week for remembrances of the anniversary, and news about what's happened (and not) since.
Props to Andy's Anagram Solver for this post's title.
dye job patsy # 5:41 PM
or, Weekend Open Thread
Talk amongst yourselves. Suggested topic this week: Where were you on September 11, 2001?
And don't forget to check Open Source Politics all this week for remembrances of the anniversary, and news about what's happened (and not) since.
Props to Andy's Anagram Solver for this post's title.
dye job patsy # 5:41 PM
Thursday, September 04, 2003
Math is Hard Redux
Spears: "I think we should just trust our president in every decision that he makes and we should just support that."
Spears: "I think we should just trust our president in every decision that he makes and we should just support that."
I like my shirts roomy
Turns out that I share a birthday with Damon Wayans, Beyonce Knowles, Paul Harvey, Richard Wright, Pink, and Mitzi Gaynor.
On this day in history, Romulus Augustus, the last emperor of the Western Roman Empire, was deposed by Odoacer, a German barbarian who proclaimed himself king of Italy in 476; Los Angeles was founded in 1781; Geronimo was captured in 1886; Pancho Gonzales and Ted Schroeder played 67 games in five sets in the longest tennis game ever in 1949; the Edsel was introduced in 1957; The Beatles recorded "Love Me Do" at Abbey Road studios in 1962; Albert Schweitzer died in 1965; both "Gilligan's Island" (1967) and "Lawrence Welk" (1971) had their last network airings; and Mark Spitz won his seventh gold medal in 1972.
If you want to give, click on the "Boot Bush" button to the right. I would be so happy this time next year to be on the verge of kicking him out.
Tuesday, September 02, 2003
Open Source Politics
www.ospolitics.org
So a couple of months ago, I was given the opportunity to get in on the ground floor of a project that would bring an unprecedented number of left-wingish bloggers together with the singular focus of spreading the good word and helping restore this country to some semblance of balance, order, democracy, and, most of all, hope.
After much back-and-forthing on a name and a format and a mission statement, we finally settled on Open Source Politics. I'd like to think our mission is fairly inherent in our name, but if it's not clear, see my opening paragraph here. We're out to tell a story, to weave a dialogue that creates an awareness of new issues and provides fresh insight to old ones. I am honored to be in the distinguished company of such luminaries as have joined this project. I will not try to list them all--there are over 40 of us, and the list is ever-changing--but among them are some of the real lights of the blogging left.
We are live today. It's starting slowly, but soon you can expect to find a dozen posts a day from some of the sharpest minds on the left side of the blogosphere in all different categories. Please don't worry about some of the clearly "to be built" aspects of the site yet; they are coming. Better hands than mine have been hard at work making sure that this thing both sings and looks pretty.
I predict that within a month, like Atrios or Daily Kos, we will be one of the few daily must-reads for the left. However, you can start now.
What does this mean for your humble Folkbum's own blog? Little, I think; I may occasionally post a teaser for what I have over at ospolitics.org, but I will keep this site moving ahead with humor, other pieces not meant for ospolitics.org, and my shameless shilling for Howard Dean. (I do need to try to stay objective on the new site!)
www.ospolitics.org
So a couple of months ago, I was given the opportunity to get in on the ground floor of a project that would bring an unprecedented number of left-wingish bloggers together with the singular focus of spreading the good word and helping restore this country to some semblance of balance, order, democracy, and, most of all, hope.
After much back-and-forthing on a name and a format and a mission statement, we finally settled on Open Source Politics. I'd like to think our mission is fairly inherent in our name, but if it's not clear, see my opening paragraph here. We're out to tell a story, to weave a dialogue that creates an awareness of new issues and provides fresh insight to old ones. I am honored to be in the distinguished company of such luminaries as have joined this project. I will not try to list them all--there are over 40 of us, and the list is ever-changing--but among them are some of the real lights of the blogging left.
We are live today. It's starting slowly, but soon you can expect to find a dozen posts a day from some of the sharpest minds on the left side of the blogosphere in all different categories. Please don't worry about some of the clearly "to be built" aspects of the site yet; they are coming. Better hands than mine have been hard at work making sure that this thing both sings and looks pretty.
I predict that within a month, like Atrios or Daily Kos, we will be one of the few daily must-reads for the left. However, you can start now.
What does this mean for your humble Folkbum's own blog? Little, I think; I may occasionally post a teaser for what I have over at ospolitics.org, but I will keep this site moving ahead with humor, other pieces not meant for ospolitics.org, and my shameless shilling for Howard Dean. (I do need to try to stay objective on the new site!)
Sunday, August 31, 2003
Making the Shareholders Happy
This blog is listed on BlogShares, which is kind of like the stock market for blogs. My market share, by the way? 0.0008%. Woo. Hoo.
But I want to give a brief shout-out to my investors:
One of these days I will hold a shareholders' meeting, like in the movies, up in the windowed corporate offices of Folkbum's Rambles and Rants. If you want to make sure you're invited to the party, go buy some shares. I just offered up an additional 1000 shares for y'all to fight over!
And, watch this space for more info tomorrow, when a new project OPENs that will be a great SOURCE for all of your questions about POLITICS, as well as health, the environment, the arts, the international scene, and lots more. Since we're not live until tomorrow, I can't give away anything about what we might be called or our URL. Sorry . . .
This blog is listed on BlogShares, which is kind of like the stock market for blogs. My market share, by the way? 0.0008%. Woo. Hoo.
But I want to give a brief shout-out to my investors:
One of these days I will hold a shareholders' meeting, like in the movies, up in the windowed corporate offices of Folkbum's Rambles and Rants. If you want to make sure you're invited to the party, go buy some shares. I just offered up an additional 1000 shares for y'all to fight over!
And, watch this space for more info tomorrow, when a new project OPENs that will be a great SOURCE for all of your questions about POLITICS, as well as health, the environment, the arts, the international scene, and lots more. Since we're not live until tomorrow, I can't give away anything about what we might be called or our URL. Sorry . . .
Friday, August 29, 2003
A slow news week. Well, on my blog, anyway.
So I give you something fun instead:
Folkbum's Rules for Writing
(I am an English teacher, you know)
1. Verbs HAS to agree with their subjects.
2. Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
3. And don't start a sentence with a conjunction.
4. It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.
5. Avoid cliches like the plague. (They're old hat.)
6. Also, always avoid annoying alliteration.
7. Be more or less specific.
8. Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are (usually) unnecessary.
9. Also too, never, ever use repetitive redundancies.
10. No sentence fragments.
11. Contractions aren't necessary and shouldn't be used.
12. Foreign words, phrases, and bon mots are not apropos.
13. Do not be redundant; do not use more words than necessary; it's highly superfluous.
14. One should NEVER generalize.
15. Comparisons are as bad as cliches.
16. Don't use no double negatives.
17. Eschew obfuscation.
18. Avoid ampersands & abbreviations, etc.
19. One-word sentences? Eliminate.
20. Analogies in writing are like fur on a snake.
21. The passive voice is to be avoided.
22. Eliminate commas, that are, not necessary. Parenthetical words however should be enclosed in commas.
23. Never use a big word when a diminutive one would suffice.
24. Kill all exclamation points!!!
25. Use words correctly, irregardless of how others use them.
26. Understatement is always the absolute best way to put forth earth-shaking ideas.
27. Use the apostrophe in it's proper place and omit it when its not needed.
28. Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "I hate quotations. Tell me what you know."
29. If you've heard it once, you've heard it a thousand times: Resist hyperbole; not one writer in a million can use it correctly.
30. Puns are for children, not groan readers.
31. Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.
32. Even if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.
33. Who needs rhetorical questions?
34. Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.
35. Use quotation marks only when you “really” need them.
(Some of these were cribbed from long-lost sources; apologies if they're yours)
So I give you something fun instead:
(I am an English teacher, you know)
1. Verbs HAS to agree with their subjects.
2. Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
3. And don't start a sentence with a conjunction.
4. It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.
5. Avoid cliches like the plague. (They're old hat.)
6. Also, always avoid annoying alliteration.
7. Be more or less specific.
8. Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are (usually) unnecessary.
9. Also too, never, ever use repetitive redundancies.
10. No sentence fragments.
11. Contractions aren't necessary and shouldn't be used.
12. Foreign words, phrases, and bon mots are not apropos.
13. Do not be redundant; do not use more words than necessary; it's highly superfluous.
14. One should NEVER generalize.
15. Comparisons are as bad as cliches.
16. Don't use no double negatives.
17. Eschew obfuscation.
18. Avoid ampersands & abbreviations, etc.
19. One-word sentences? Eliminate.
20. Analogies in writing are like fur on a snake.
21. The passive voice is to be avoided.
22. Eliminate commas, that are, not necessary. Parenthetical words however should be enclosed in commas.
23. Never use a big word when a diminutive one would suffice.
24. Kill all exclamation points!!!
25. Use words correctly, irregardless of how others use them.
26. Understatement is always the absolute best way to put forth earth-shaking ideas.
27. Use the apostrophe in it's proper place and omit it when its not needed.
28. Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "I hate quotations. Tell me what you know."
29. If you've heard it once, you've heard it a thousand times: Resist hyperbole; not one writer in a million can use it correctly.
30. Puns are for children, not groan readers.
31. Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.
32. Even if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.
33. Who needs rhetorical questions?
34. Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.
35. Use quotation marks only when you “really” need them.
(Some of these were cribbed from long-lost sources; apologies if they're yours)
Tuesday, August 26, 2003
The REALLY Big Time
And I ain't talking Dick Cheney, neither
So at first I was on Democratic Underground. Then I was on Daily Kos. But this is the real Big Time: USA Today!
And I ain't talking Dick Cheney, neither
So at first I was on Democratic Underground. Then I was on Daily Kos. But this is the real Big Time: USA Today!
"I consider myself a Howard-powered person," says [Folkbum], 28, coordinator of Milwaukee For Dean, playing off Dean's "people-powered Howard" slogan. Other candidates ask for people's votes, the high school English teacher says, but only Dean has sought their leadership skills and feedback. The result is a surge of involvement by newcomers, and a pledge from Dean to bring 3 million new voters into the process.
Saturday, August 23, 2003
Another Open Thread
Stuff's just too crazy this weekend. Howard Dean will be here tonight as part of the Sleepless Summer tour; Darryl Purpose is playing a house concert at my house on Monday; my first real day of school is Thursday; and next Monday--Labor Day--comes the launch of a new, top-secret multi-blogger project (more details then). Plus then comes my birthday soon after (hint: I like my shirts roomy).
In other words, posting will be light over the next two weeks. So can I count on you to entertain yourselves for a little while? Thanks. If you need a suggested topic, how about this: How has No Child Left Behind affected your local schools? I get visitors from all over the place, and I'd be interested in hearing what's going on in your town. Provide links to sources, too, if you could.
Stuff's just too crazy this weekend. Howard Dean will be here tonight as part of the Sleepless Summer tour; Darryl Purpose is playing a house concert at my house on Monday; my first real day of school is Thursday; and next Monday--Labor Day--comes the launch of a new, top-secret multi-blogger project (more details then). Plus then comes my birthday soon after (hint: I like my shirts roomy).
In other words, posting will be light over the next two weeks. So can I count on you to entertain yourselves for a little while? Thanks. If you need a suggested topic, how about this: How has No Child Left Behind affected your local schools? I get visitors from all over the place, and I'd be interested in hearing what's going on in your town. Provide links to sources, too, if you could.
Thursday, August 21, 2003
In case you couldn't tell
You are a Folkie. Good for you.
What kind of Sixties Person are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
(Via Poison Kitchen.)
You are a Folkie. Good for you.
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Righteous Anger
Every once in a while, I come across a particularly moving piece elsewhere on the net that I have to share. Sometimes I merely link to it; today's essay is reproduced in its entirety, as the author, mccbill, does not have a blog of his own. It's based on this NPR report.
I have long held the belief that the war in Iraq was unjust and wrong. We were lied to time and again by this administration and the reason for the lies is that the truth is too weak and self serving for the US public to agree with. I knew that hundreds of our soldiers would die and will continue to die, and I knew that thousands of Iraqis would die, all the while our unjustified military action would make us less safe at home and elsewhere in the world.
Well, this morning those thousands of dead Iraqis have a face: Helma Al-Saadi.
You may or may not remember her as the German born wife of Amer Al-Saadi. Amer was the top science and weapons advisor to Iraq who voluntarily surrendered to US forces on April 12th. He was the first of the US's "55 Most Wanted" list to be captured because he walked up to some soldiers in Baghdad with his change of clothes and turned himself in.
He wasn't a Baathist and hadn't been involved in Iraq government for years before he was tapped to be a liason for the Iraq to the UN weapons inspectors that were readmitted to the country last year. He wasn't a fan of Saddam but was fairly well respected for his scientific brilliance, integrity, and concern for his country.
He was schooled in London over 30 years ago and was there that he met his German wife, Helma. They met, fell in love, and married. She returned with him to Iraq after schooling and they began a family. When Saddam came to power they contemplated defecting, but he was tapped as a valuable Iraqi science resource and not allowed to leave the country before they could make their move. He was so concerned for his family however, that he begged his wife to take their children and leave so that they would be safe.
His wife eventually complied and left the country for 20 years, only seeing her husband once or twice a year and limited to lengthy phone conversations. Their love for each other did not diminish, and once their children were raised she returned to Iraq to be with her husband. By this time, Amer had wormed his way out of government, having walked a fine line between standing up for his beliefs by not caving into pressure to join the Baath party, and following orders in development of rocket and artillery technology for Iraq.
He was free, but observed for several years before being reactivated to interface with the UN and convince them that Iraq had destroyed all of their banned weapons. When Baghdad fell, he waited until the streets were clear before giving an interview to a German public television station and then turning himself in. His wife wanted to go with him but he bade her to stay home. He took a change of clothes and some books to read and assured her that he would be home in anywhere from three hours to no more than three days. When they kissed across from the US controlled Republic Palace it was the last time she would ever see her husband.
This Chief Science Advisor to Saddam Hussein gave himself up and told the US and the German media that Iraq had no banned weapons and no active nuclear, biological, or chemical weapons programs. He told them that Iraq had destroyed them in the mid 90's. He told them what they didn't want to hear.
Helm Al-Saadi had only received two letters from her husband in over four months since April 12th. Those letters were limited to a maximum of one page each. She had plead to the consul and US authorities to have her husband who had cooperated fully released and yet nothing had happened. She tried international and media channels and yet nothing had happened.
On Tuesday, August 19th, Helma Al-Saadi had taken her case to the UN. At 4:25pm she was near the office of the UN appointed official in Iraq. At 4:30pm a bomb exploded under his window killing 20+ people. Helma apparently was one of those people.
Damn you George W. Bush. You are an awful president, a horrible tyrant of a democratic country, and an evil person. Damn you to hell.
Wednesday, August 20, 2003
Why do Republicans Hate America?
Ask your Republican friends (if you have any left) that question. All the time. And if they say, "Republicans don't hate America," pause for a moment to beg to differ.
Offer as proof the fact that the very thing that has made this country great--our Constitution--is being ignored at will by Republicans. They seem to feel that the safeguards and protections Our Founding Fathers are meaningless. There is no clearer proof of this than the electoral shenanigans going on all over the country as we speak.
Exhibit A: Redistricting. It's happening most famously in Texas, of course, but efforts at redistricting to tighten Republican control of the US House of Representatives is going on Colorado, Georgia, and now in my former homeland of Ohio.
Texas redictricting is being done under the thumb of Tom DeLay, who can't seem to fathom why districts in his home state that are already Republican-rich keep electing Democrats. Could it be because that's what the voters want? And in Ohio, the Republicans controlled the redistricting process after the 2000 census. And now they want a do-over, because they see that other states are getting away with it!
Exhibit B: Recalls. Again, California is getting all the attention, but it is hardly alone. Seeing how easy it is to recall a duly-elected Democrat, Republicans elsewhere now feel up to that challenge. Take my home state of Wisconsin, for example. A couple years back, we had a big dust-up here in Milwaukee that led to the recall of quite a few Milwaukee County Supervisors. The Republican-fronted group that spearheaded the recalls of (technically non-partisan but clearly) Democratic supervisors, "Citizens for Responsible Government", is now gearing up to recall a dozen or more Democratic state legislators for doing their jobs well.
And, to top it off, there's also a "Recall Jim Doyle" campaign, aimed at the Democratic governor. I wouldn't be surprised if soon the Republican-controlled legislature starts contemplating redistricting, too.
These exhibits, of course, are simply an outgrowth of the success Republicans had in Florida in 2000. There are serious fears that an even worse electoral disaster is coming with the voting machines being produced by Republican-owned companies, whose security is suspect and whose software is proprietary and, therefore, not open to scrutiny.
The Republicans seem hell-bent on making this country into a one-party state. You might even call it a kleptocracy. This is truly scary when you consider how absolutely horrible Republican stewardship has been of late, both at the national and state level.
I want my country back, people. I want it back from those who hate America.
Ask your Republican friends (if you have any left) that question. All the time. And if they say, "Republicans don't hate America," pause for a moment to beg to differ.
Offer as proof the fact that the very thing that has made this country great--our Constitution--is being ignored at will by Republicans. They seem to feel that the safeguards and protections Our Founding Fathers are meaningless. There is no clearer proof of this than the electoral shenanigans going on all over the country as we speak.
Exhibit A: Redistricting. It's happening most famously in Texas, of course, but efforts at redistricting to tighten Republican control of the US House of Representatives is going on Colorado, Georgia, and now in my former homeland of Ohio.
Texas redictricting is being done under the thumb of Tom DeLay, who can't seem to fathom why districts in his home state that are already Republican-rich keep electing Democrats. Could it be because that's what the voters want? And in Ohio, the Republicans controlled the redistricting process after the 2000 census. And now they want a do-over, because they see that other states are getting away with it!
Exhibit B: Recalls. Again, California is getting all the attention, but it is hardly alone. Seeing how easy it is to recall a duly-elected Democrat, Republicans elsewhere now feel up to that challenge. Take my home state of Wisconsin, for example. A couple years back, we had a big dust-up here in Milwaukee that led to the recall of quite a few Milwaukee County Supervisors. The Republican-fronted group that spearheaded the recalls of (technically non-partisan but clearly) Democratic supervisors, "Citizens for Responsible Government", is now gearing up to recall a dozen or more Democratic state legislators for doing their jobs well.
And, to top it off, there's also a "Recall Jim Doyle" campaign, aimed at the Democratic governor. I wouldn't be surprised if soon the Republican-controlled legislature starts contemplating redistricting, too.
These exhibits, of course, are simply an outgrowth of the success Republicans had in Florida in 2000. There are serious fears that an even worse electoral disaster is coming with the voting machines being produced by Republican-owned companies, whose security is suspect and whose software is proprietary and, therefore, not open to scrutiny.
The Republicans seem hell-bent on making this country into a one-party state. You might even call it a kleptocracy. This is truly scary when you consider how absolutely horrible Republican stewardship has been of late, both at the national and state level.
I want my country back, people. I want it back from those who hate America.
Tuesday, August 19, 2003
MSN's search engine must be awful
I find it funny to look at what search strings bring vistors to my site. My favorite of all time, of course, is the Elizabeth Edwards big fat cow string. I did not have those words in that order on my page, but they were all there in one entry or another.
But today I got found through wedding of Michael Huffington and Ariana. Not believing that particular string could really bring up my site, I tried it, through MSN's search, which was how this person did it. My site was the only one to come up.
More useful every day--Not!
Of course, divorce of Michael Huffington and Ariana lands you 23 hits.
(The search engine of record, Google, gets you 110 and 43 hits, respectively, on the Huffington strings. The Elizabeth Edwards one gets you 3230.)
UPDATE: Today, I've been hit twice by people searching on MSN for Peter Uberoth, which appears once on this page with no real information about him. Yet, through MSN, I'm fourth of 34 about him--but only if you spell Peter Ueberroth's name wrong! My bad, Peter! (I'm leaving the bad spelling below since, hey, it generates hits.)
I find it funny to look at what search strings bring vistors to my site. My favorite of all time, of course, is the Elizabeth Edwards big fat cow string. I did not have those words in that order on my page, but they were all there in one entry or another.
But today I got found through wedding of Michael Huffington and Ariana. Not believing that particular string could really bring up my site, I tried it, through MSN's search, which was how this person did it. My site was the only one to come up.
More useful every day--Not!
Of course, divorce of Michael Huffington and Ariana lands you 23 hits.
(The search engine of record, Google, gets you 110 and 43 hits, respectively, on the Huffington strings. The Elizabeth Edwards one gets you 3230.)
UPDATE: Today, I've been hit twice by people searching on MSN for Peter Uberoth, which appears once on this page with no real information about him. Yet, through MSN, I'm fourth of 34 about him--but only if you spell Peter Ueberroth's name wrong! My bad, Peter! (I'm leaving the bad spelling below since, hey, it generates hits.)
Monday, August 18, 2003
Via Plucky Punk, another quiz:
An accomplished diplomat who can virtually do no wrong, you sometimes know it is best to rely on the council of others while holding the reins.
There are some words which I have known since I was a schoolboy. "With the first link, the chain is forged. The first speech censored, the first thought forbidden, the first freedom denied, chains us all irrevocably." These words were uttered by Judge Aaron Satie -- as a wisdom, and warning. The first time any man's freedom is trodden on, we're all damaged.
Jean-Luc is a character in the Star Trek universe. This "The Next Generation" fan site has an outline of his career.
What's disturbing is that there are more Wesley Crushers than Picards . . .
Saturday, August 16, 2003
Today's Rant: Corporatism
I missed "Fair and Balanced Friday" yesterday. I had this post most of the way finished and ready to go, and then-- I was busy. Yeah, I know. Me. Busy. On a Friday. Who woulda thunk it? But I was. Anyhow:
A while back I promised everyone an essay on why we hate Joe Lieberman. I mean, I don't hate him personally, or anything, but a lot of Democrats and progressives vow that they will never vote for Holy Joe, at least not without holding their noses while they do it.
Among the reasons people give are Joe's moralizing and overt religiosity, his monotone, his perceived conservatism, his lackluster performance against Dick "Big Time" Cheney in the 2000 debate, and his rolling over during the Florida recount (he'd won his senate seat; why bother?). My favorite description of Joe compared him to Eeyore, from the Winnie the Pooh books and cartoons: "Oh, bother," in that kind of sad droning whine. There's a very damning article about all of his faults here.
But above all, people were outraged at the image of Joe as corporate toady. He's been described as "one of the most conservative and pro-corporate Democrats in the U.S. Senate." Common Dreams "wonders what sections of the Bible or Talmud he is relying on to justify being a wholly-owned Senate subsidiary of drug and insurance companies, military contractors and the nuclear power industry - all of which contribute heavily to his campaign coffers?" Common Dreams also points out that Lieberman "has also opposed medical insurance reform, except in watered-down industry- friendly versions, and argued against permitting patients to sue HMOs for punitive damages. One of Lieberman's biggest campaign contributors is the insurance industry." Perhaps most damning is the fact that
Lieberman lead the charge to prevent the Federal Accounting Standards Board (FASB) from instituting proper accounting of stock options. One of the ways Enron and other corporations are overstating their profits is by not including the stock options that they issue to their top executives against their profits. These stock options do not show up as a cost on a corporation's financial statements. Lieberman with the support of big corporations prevented the FASB from implementing this change. Enron and other corporations used this accounting practice to deceive investors and employees.Sure, that was a Green Party article, but even the Republicans blame him for that!
It's no accident that I quoted the Greens, though. A lot of people blame the Green Party and Ralph Nader for the situation we're in now. (A lot of other people blame Lieberman.) The Greens claimed that there was no real difference between Democrats and Republicans. That is, of course, a lie. There are plenty of institutional differences that keep me voting Democratic: choice, health care, federal judgeships, affirmative action, and more.
But where it is clear that no real difference exists is in the realm of corporatism. There, the Greens have it right. We Dean supporters have plenty of bones to pick with Lieberman and the Democratic Leadership Council (DLC) lately. But I personally feel that the worst damage the DLC, Bill Clinton, Joe Lieberman, and their like have done to the Democratic Party is make us too much like Republicans in our reliance on corporate cash and, consequently, on our subservience to corporate wishes.
In no way are all Democrats as bad as Republicans. In fact, I think in general Democrats are nowhere near as bad as Republicans. But the Republicans currently in charge--the "neoconservatives," as they're called--and the establishment DLC types have too much in common in this area.
The neocons, of course, are all about the Project for the New American Century, which relies on the military-industiral complex. The DLC relies much more in the entertainment-industrial complex. But above all, both groups are what could be called Cheap Labor Conservatives (CLC).
The CLCs by and large are interested in letting corporations, who are by far their biggest source of political support, treat workers like crap. They are much more interested in free-trade policies like NAFTA and GATT (passed under Clinton, supported by Lieberman), because these agreements allow for cheap production overseas, than in supporting unions and workers here at home. CLCs are opposed to employment and social programs (Clinton "ended Welfare as we [knew] it" and Lieberman has warned against Dean's plan to repeal the Whopper's tax cuts to provide for those among us in need), since the more we can keep people poor, the less we have to pay them to clean the bathrooms at the Wal-Mart.
The United States has almost totally lost its traditional sources of economic strength. Agricultural and manufacturing jobs are disappearing. (What's really disturbing is how the family farm is being eaten by cheap-labor corporations with the assent of our government!) All we're left with is service jobs. Two-thirds of our GDP anymore is consumer spending. We are a nation now not of production but consumption. This is what screwed Rome, my friends.
It's obvious why PNAC neocons need cheap labor: There must be cheap products to spread around the world under American corporate leadership. But the DLC's support seems suspect. I think it goes back to 1984: Walter Mondale lost, really badly, in 1984, and he lost after opposing Reagan's give-backs to the corporations and wealthy donors. The DLC formed and decided that, since Mondale lost on that platform, the way to win would be to adopt the Republican position vis a vis corporations. The DLC came of age with Bill Clinton, and they often take credit (wrongly, in my opinion) for his victory. But under Clinton and since, CLC policies have taken priority, with DLC complicity.
And this is why Joe Lieberman and the DLC must be stopped. Period.
But beyond that, we need to completely divorce corporate influence from politics. Absolutely. So, in the spirit of not just complaining about the problem but offering a solution, too, I present the Folkbum Federal Campaign Finance Reform Package:
- Disabuse ourselves of the notion that spending money is the same as free speech. It isn't. And it isn't fair, either, since the poor and those who represent the poor will never be able to afford as much "speech" as the wealthy or those who represent the wealthy. And if influence is purchased through campaign donations or campaign commercials, the the influence advantage automatically goes to the wealthy. One $2000 donor will wield more influence than 1000 $1 donors, and that's not democracy. This means no non-candidate TV or print ads.
- Outlaw lobbyists. I don't want to outlaw lobbying: You can still call, fax, email, or visit your congresscritter to deliver your personal opinion on things and ask it to vote in a certain way on a certian subject. That's democracy, my friend. But I want to outlaw everyone who works for PHARMA or the Sierra Club or AARP or NEA, basically anyone who asks for stuff while on someone else's dime. That's not democracy.
- Limit contributions only to those who can actually vote for the candidate being donated to. That eliminates out-of-state contributors, as well as contributions from non-individuals, PACs, unions, and all.
- Eliminate the caps on individual contributions. Yes, you read that right: If you have a million, donate a million. If you have a nickel, donate a nickel.
- Have all contributions sent first to a central disbursement center run by the FEC. You can locate this somewhere like Pueblo, Colorado, or wherever you want. But the money comes in there first, and then gets distributed regularly to the candidates.
- Here's why the last two will work: When campaign funds are distributed to the candidates, they receive an alphabetical list of contributors without any details of how much they gave! It's ingenious, really; I can claim that I donated a million when I only donated a nickel. Those used to buying influence now will be relieved of the pressure to donate such large sums. And candidates will be beholden to all contributors equally! Again, that is democracy.
Thursday, August 14, 2003
Howard Dean=Elwood Blues?
If there aren't enough reasons to support Howard Dean already:
"Howard Dean, the former governor of Vermont, is set to continue his attention-grabbing campaign by playing harmonica tomorrow night at a Des Moines blues club."
If there aren't enough reasons to support Howard Dean already:
"Howard Dean, the former governor of Vermont, is set to continue his attention-grabbing campaign by playing harmonica tomorrow night at a Des Moines blues club."
What are they smoking?
Via Talk Left, we find the "Granite Staters" for Medical Marijuana voter guide, wherein Howard Dean scores an F+ (should have done a little more studying there at medical school, Howard!).
They write,
Dean is the only candidate who has actually killed a medical marijuana bill. [. . .] Dean recently retreated from his earlier pledge to direct the FDA to study medical marijuana. His reversal and his actions have shown that medical marijuana patients can never trust him.As Jon Stewart would say, "Whaaaaaaaa?"
I seem to remember this from the other night:
KING: Santa Cruz, California, hello.What "reversal"? I don't see it.
CALLER: Hi Governor Dean. My question to you is, given your medical background and your view on states' rights, in your opinion, what should the federal government do about medical marijuana?
DEAN: I don't think they should throw people in jail in California, but I think do think--here's what I think. I think the process by which medical marijuana is being legalized is the wrong process. I don't like it when politicians interfere in medicine. It's why I am very pro-choice. Because I don't think that is the government's business. So what I will do as president is, I will require the FDA within first 12 months to evaluate marijuana and see if it is, in fact, a decent medicine or not. If it is, for what purposes [. . .]. But we have to do the FDA studies. I think marijuana should be treated like every other drug in the process and there shouldn't be a special process which is based on politics to legalize it.
Howard Dean's position is simple: He does not want lawmakers or voters practicing medicine. Period. That's why he is pro-choice, why he supports using the FDA to legalize medical marijuana, and why he supports treating drug addiction like a disease, not a crime.
What I really like, though, is this juicy bit from the "Granite Staters" web site:
That's why "Granite Staters" should really be in quotation marks. The Marijuana Policy Project's whole purpose for existing to is work to enact new legislation and redact old legislation. Any candidate who proposes any solution to the medical marijuana question that is not legislative in nature will fail by their standards.This campaign is staffed and funded by the Marijuana Policy Project
P.O. Box 77492 - Capitol Hill - Washington, DC - 20013
Too bad for Howard Dean, who is instead willing to let doctors make the medical decisions.
By the way, the only candidate who receives higher than a C is that say-what-your-hippie-fans-want-to-hear marvel Dennis Kucinich.
UPDATE: I received a FAIR and BALANCED email from Aaron Houston, whose office is, admittedly, in New Hampshire, who writes:
Thank you for your feedback related to Granite Staters for Medical Marijuana's (GSMM) website and particularly, for your input on Governor Dean's page in the voter guide. As you probably know, campaigns are sometimes hectic, so thank you for bringing the omission to our attention.Also check out Aaron's comment in the comments below. And Howard Dean's new grade? F+! Sigh.
We have changed Governor Dean's page based on the information you sent. Please visit http://www.granitestaters.com/guide/dean.html to view the updated page.
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